bluiis: (happy--Googly images)
Guess what I have? A chest of drawers! See, not long after we were married, we discovered the joys of Big Lots, and as a result, we bought a bed and dresser with a mirror there. Our dresser's too big to go upstairs (we tried), and though we have two closets in our bedroom, they're both teeny tiny. One is for hang-up clothes; the other has three shelves that I've crammed our folded clothes onto. But no more! We have a chest of drawers! *squee*

And, yes, I'll take a picture of it for y'all. I realize I have quite a few pictures to show y'all, but I'll get 'em on here today or tomorrow.

Oh, and guess what I found today? There's a sheet of paper in the basket on our back counter in the kitchen that has my writing on it, and today I got curious and read it. It's some scribbles regarding a story I thought of a few years ago. Oh my WORD it's good. I can't believe I thought it up! So I may just have to dust off my laptop and get typing. (I can't use the desktop computer because if I get stuck [and I will get stuck] I'll be tempted to use the internet.)

Overwhelmed

Oct. 5th, 2005 09:40 pm
bluiis: (Default)

   I just read all of Sarah's entries, and I feel mowed down.  Not only do I feel as though I don't make LJ worth having me, also I feel bad cuz I know Sarah reads this and she's the only one.  It's got to be boring for her.  But I don't know how to make more friends on LJ.

   I agree that if you have a boring life, it's your fault.  When I was a kid, I heard a very good saying once:  "If you're bored, it's because you're boring."  Kinda painful, but true.  But I'm bored.

   We went to the Freyburg Fair today, and it was so much fun!  I've never seen steers or horses that big!  They're rears stood higher than my head, and I'm not short!  Jill had a ball (I can just hear her saying "ba! ba!  She always does whenever I use that expression.), and we got Christmas presents for all our parents.  It was nice because Jon usually doesn't like to stay long, but we were there for about three or four hours.  Then we went to go say hi to Ginny, then we came home and Jon made an apple pie.  See, I'm so backward.  I don't like to cook or bake, and Jon does.  And my food (scuse my language) sucks.  Jon's is good.  Hello, I'm the one who put cinnamon in the spaghetti sauce (long story)!

   Anyway, we had fun today, but we really regret letting Jill get so spoiled.  She whines when she wants something, and screams when we tell her no (not always, thank goodness), and though she's still a mostly good little girl, she's spoiled.  I can't wait till we finally settle down.  She needs routine.  I've only just started putting her to bed at 8 again; we had moved it up to 9 just for convenience's sake.  At least she didn't fight it tonight; we'd even gotten lax about that!  But when she screams, the battle usually ends within a week.  And we always win. 

   I'm kind of scared about moving; not the physical act, but because life is going to go on.  And I've come to realize that I really don't want to work.  Like, I knew that before, but especially so since working for Faith and having the pookster with me all day.  I don't like having to ignore her and always scolding her because I can't spend time with her.  I want to stay with my baby.  Also, I want to breastfeed my next kid, and though I should be able to (state laws and such being the way they are), it won't be easy.  And I want to use cloth diapers, but I won't be able to if another person (or a daycare) keeps the kids.  Also, I lose patience easily, and when I'm not around Jill all day, I haven't had a chance to bond, and get frustrated too easy.

   I want to write!  I don't want to work, but I'll probably need to.  I'd love to work at home, but what could I do?

   Oh, I didn't mean to come on here to complain.  Really, I do have a good life.  I'm blessed with a wonderful husband, and pretty good little girl who I get to watch blossom into a little person, and a relatively carefree life.  So why do I complain?

   I wish I had some married friends.  There are so many wonderful things about being married that I can't discuss on here.  Actually, I guess it's not married friends I crave, but friends period.  So I'll just say that I love being married.  The closeness, the shared bed, the love, the child, the good times and bad (though those I could do without), the fact that though I married my best friend, he'll never grow old.  I love Jon so much, I don't know what I'd do without him.

   Anyway, I've been on this laptop so long, I've got that kink in my shoulder I always get whenever I stay at the computer too long (or a cash register).

   Good night, journal.

bluiis: (Default)

   It's one in the morning and I can't sleep.  We just went to bed forty-five minutes ago, and I wasn't really tired then, but figured I'd be when I slipped beneath the beconning sheets.  Except they weren't beconning.  They had no appeal at all.  So I lay there with Jon's arm over me, trying to move just enough to get him to roll over, but not enough to wake him up.  There's a fine balance.  Eventually, he rolled over.  And Sox came to my pillow and still sleep alluded me.  (I think the fact that I don't write is apparent in my spelling--it's atrocious!)

   I kept thinking, "Go type.  Then you'll sleep.  Go post something on LJ, ya bad journal keeper.  Go write!"  So finally I listened to the voice in my head.  You know, maybe it was the muse speaking.  I haven't been listening lately, so I think I've forgotten the sound of her voice.  And the muse is definitely a she.

   Anyway, I couldn't sleep, so here I am.  And I have nothing to say.  I'm not really tired, but I don't want to complain about something or someone while in here.  And I don't really have anything interesting to say.

   I guess I could talk about Mark Twain.  Now there's an interesting writer.  What's the first book that comes to mind when you think of him?  For me, it's Huckleberry Finn, followed closely by Tom Sawyer.  Never do I think The Innocent's Abroad.  But we have that book, and we haven't been to the library in a long time (I owe for three lost books, and Jon has a fine for books that we've had for over a month and a half now).  And I'm undeniably a bookworm.  I gotta have a book to read, or I go crazy.  And you know, you get tired of reading the same old books over and over and over.  So I picked up The Innocent's Abroad, thinking it would be about some misplaced or misguided children.  Boy was I wrong!  It's about some American's who've decided to see the world on a crusise who have nothing but time on their side, and who can go wherever they want.

   But it's not the plot that has me rivited (I've not been able to read it for a couple of days).  It's the prose.  He writes beautifully, and if it's not beautiful, it's at least crisp.  He has literally taken my breath away with certain passages.  And though I like Huck and Tom, and Twain's short stories, I've never credited him with the genius that he truly has.  The Innocent's Abroad is truly beautiful.  The story drags a little, but the writing is beautiful.

bluiis: (Default)

   I have to write in here, though, because I've made a vow to write in here at least once a week.  Don't know if it'll happen, but I figure it's a good goal to set.  When I used to keep a diary, I used to write once a day, maybe more. 

   My little girl is sick.  Last time she had a fever, we ended up taking her to the ER, and it spiked at 105.5.  Want to tell you, it scared us bad.  So we've kept up with ibuprofen every four hours.  We don't want this one to get out of control.  By the way, she had pink eye last time, but the doctor still thought it unusual for her to have such a temp.  Oh, well, not even they know everything.  Anyway, if she's sick, I'll have to stay home with her.  If Jon's sick (which he has been all morning), he'll keep her home with him.  But I pray that she's not.  I hate when my little girl is sick.

   I was wrong about when I can quit work at SRCS.  My last day will be the 29th.  But still, that's not far at all.  Just next month.  I just have to get through summer camp, and it's going pretty quickly.  And I do enjoy working with the second graders.  They're so receptive.  And most of them are smart.  Yes, I do have those who are defiant and want to do their own thing, but even those ones I love.  I want to say that if I never knew that love was a choice (albeit a difficult one sometimes), I have learned it is just working with children.  You can't hate any of them, of course, but you really can't dislike them either.  You have to choose to love them.  That comes easily with some, but not all of them.  This is where God comes in.  Some of those kids it's tough to love.

   Anyway, I should probably skidaddle.  Earlier today, I read Our Town, a play by a man whose name I can't think of now.  Anyway, in the end Emily Webb dies in childbirth and she chooses not to accept death.  So she picks a day (her twelfth birthday) to live over again, and realizes that no one really takes time to see how lovely life is.  I've been thinking of that all day, and it's true.  We get so caught up in life that we never take the time to observe it.  It all flies by, and one day down the road we'll stop and realize that it passed up and we never even noticed.  So I've decided to take life slower.  I'm going to notice the color of the leaves, look at the way my baby smiles, really savor the love between me and Jon.  I'm going to try to look at life more as the gift that it is rather than a race to be won.

   Anyway, let me sign off.

 

bluiis: (Default)

   I really should be downstairs washing the dishes.  That's the only thing left to do, but I hate washing them.  I don't know why.  It doesn't take me long, and there aren't even many to do.  Most can go in the dishwasher.

   I haven't written in here in so long, so I have a lot to say.  But I probably won't, because Jon'll be home soon and I'd like it to look halfway decent when he gets home.

   To start, I don't work at the Merry-Go-Round anymore.  Praise the Lord!  I could go on about how I disliked working there, but I'll save it for another day.  I now work at the school from 8 to 4, instead of 10 to 6.  I am very thankful for that.  The only thing I don't like is that Jill now gets interrupted in her afternoon nap.  But I only have six more weeks, and then I can stay home.

   Jon talked to Pastor Mars and I'll be working for the seminary, but from home.  I'll be grading papers, burning CDs, and a bunch of other stuff.  I'll have to go in two hours every day, but I can go whenever I want, so I'm going to try to go during Jill's naptime.

   The school runs a daycamp during the summer, and I have the second grade.  Though challenging, I love it.  Especially Bible time.  They ask all  manner of questions, and I've had to search the Scriptures a few times.  They're good for me, because they make me more knowledgeable about my Bible.  And they're like sponges.  They soak up what I have to say. 

   Jill's growing like a weed.  I can't believe how fast she's growing.  She walks everywhere, but she's still clumsy.  She has so many bruises on her forhead and under her chin.  Another reason I'm excited about working from home is that I'll be able to potty train her when I want to.  In just a few more months, I'm going to try.  My goal is to have her trained by the time she's two. 

   I had started writing again, but now I've stopped again.  It's very hard to find time, though I know if I really tried, I could.  I'm hoping that by working from home, I'll find some of that missing time.

   Santa Rosa County, where I live, is one of the few dry counties in the country.  We do sell beer and wine, but no hard liquor.  This has been voted on 33 times in the past 40 or 50 years, and the people have always voted to keep it dry.  The reason we sell any alchohol at all is because the state mandates it.  Anyway, it's a big fight every time, and the last time this came up, the former pastor (whom I have no respect for) was able to prove in a court of law that alchohol is a drug.  Anyway, we're trying to keep this issue from going to vote, but if it does, we're praying that we can keep our county dry.

   I really ought to go.  Because I keep worrying that Jon will be home before the house is clean, I'm not really concentrating.  So hopefully I'll be able to write again soon.

bluiis: (Default)

   First of all, life is hectic!  That's why I haen't written in so long.  Also, pretty soon I have a feeling that's what I won't want to do just because I'll be doing it constantly.

   I work at Santa Rosa Christian School now; from 10 to 12 I work at the day care, Merry-Go-Round, then from noon till 6 I work at the school.  I love my job.  Not necessarily the first two hours, b/c I just do lunches, then clean for the teachers (sweeping, mopping), but it's okay.  And I've learned some valuable lessons a/o the teachers there, so it's good that I work there.  (More on that later.)

   Also,  soon I'll be an accomplished author.  So soon e/o will be asking for my autograph.  Ladies and gentlemen, presenting (drum roll please) Carol Starkey!

   Anyway, I'll try to write more in here tomorrow b/c I'm so tired!

  

February 2016

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